Think, “GHANDI!”  The lack of resistance will drive them crazy!   Always insist that you are most concerned about the welfare for your children.   “'Tis far better to be humble in court ---rather than be humbled ------ after they have taken everything from you.”

Even back in those days when I was an activist, just a couple years ago, when I hoped and prayed to see my son again, a lot of advice was disseminated from this Purple Heart House computer.  There was so much hope then, just a couple years ago.  There are those in many countries who wore Purple Heart buttons when they went to court.   There were even those of you who passed out the buttons to all the litigants in court.  Some have told me that even the judge on the bench had pinned a KIDS NEED FATHERS button on his gown. We should have had a picture of that.

The Purple Heart House was a wonderful idea and brought so many of us together.  My advice at the end of every passionate piece sent out to you all was “NEVER EVER GIVE UP!”  In the end, after filing two federal lawsuits for the courts abuse … after the abuse of being hauled off by the Gestapo to Coo-Coo Ville --- and spending time in jail with murderers and rapists, my passion and optimistic view had changed considerably.  The Family Law Gestapo had taught me a lesson.  “Do not mess with our system of corruption! WE WILL DESTROY YOU!”
   It was a very sad day when I realized that the Purple Heart House was just a beautiful dream for thousands of us…but in the end, no one who could help us really cared…. And anyone who fought the system would be punished and penalized forever.   We sadly removed all the purple hearts with your pictures and stories in them and painted out all the 1400 purple hearts.   The Purple Heart House was just a memory and became the old beige house.  I apologized to all my fellow activists for disappointing them.  I was ashamed to finally give in and give up the fight.

It was obvious I would never see my son again, and every friend on-line who had hopes of more time with the children was having less and less time.  Rather than getting more rights, more visitation ---   we all were losing what few rights we had.  You realize now that my advice to New Victims of Family Law Courts is right on.

The Purple Heart House project was gone.  I had spent more than four years concentrating on what would help us get the attention of the world to put pressure on the court system to help families.  No one cared.  TIME, PEOPLE, NEWSWEEK, 20/20, 60 MINUTES………… NO ONE CARED!

Who had ever before seen anything like it?  Here was Clark Gable’s old home,   the four story house in the Hollywood Hills, covered with 1400 Purple hearts and hundreds of stories and pictures of destroyed families?  NO one cared!  The hundreds of fathers, mothers, grandparents who had been alienated from their children and grandchildren had sent pictures along with their heartbreaking stories.  The Wall of Hope was covered with those true stories of how the corruption of Family Court ---  had torn families to shreds.   That incredible passion and thousands of hours of planning had come and gone and we had no success to show for it.  There was never a day when we did not see dozens of neighbors and strangers reading those stories with tear-filled eyes.

So many of them would thank us for having this demonstration of love and pain because their lives, too, had been shattered by the deplorable actions of divorce court lawyers and judges.  Dozens of strangers would drop their stories and pictures into the mailbox.  It was the first opportunity many of them ever had for a chance to share what really happened to their families.  We had uncovered and displayed to the world --- the dirty little secret of the corruption in our justice system.

Now, we are older, have less energy, less optimism, less to look forward to.  We did our best!  There is no way we could have fought harder.  We were just outnumbered and out-spent by the enemy.  We did our best.
   There are not many of you reading this who’ve not been through the corruption of family law courts.  You have the scars to prove it whether you are male or female, parent or grandparent.  Some have a bit of hope that things may improve….but most have also come to the conclusion that nothing will ever change.

By now, you may have realized that in order to function and try to “get over it,”   changes must be made in your lifestyle or the pain and anguish will destroy your life and your health.  You have more than likely cried until your body ached.  You may have been on your knees praying, even though prayer had not been important before this happened to you.  You most certainly have difficulty sleeping.   You may have signs of gastronomic disorders.  You may be having dinner in a restaurant and the sight of a family with children may cause you to begin to sob, although tears were never a part of your life.

The longing to see that child, to hear that wonderful voice say, “ I love you Daddy!”   “I love you Mama!”   "I love you Grandma, Grandpa!” may be so painful, you want to die.  You cannot deny that has happened to you.
   What do we do to survive this unthinkable hollow space in our lives?   Someone has taken every thing you ever owned and strangers are raising your children.  It’s tempting to deaden the pain by any means possible …….. but booze or drugs will only lead to more complex problems.  Your number-one-project is to survive and work to become the success you were --- before family court destruction.   You deserve to have a successful fulfilling life.  You have paid and paid and paid your dues.  Most importantly, you must be ready for when your children come back to you.

What is your passion in life?  Most people will admit they ended up SETTLING.   They settled for a life that they had never planned or dreamed of living.   They wanted to be a professional … to be a doctor, but it was far too difficult and they Settled for being a teacher.  Those extra 4 or 5 years of University was just too much.  Being a teacher is a wonderful profession….but the DREAM was to be a doctor.

Any statistic from any poll taken will state that most people did not follow their dreams to fruition.  When I was a kid, when you asked a little boy what he wanted to be many would say -------- “a policeman or a fireman or an athlete, a spaceman, etc.” -----   countless dreams.
   Nowadays, the answer may be, “When I grow up, I want to be a “gang-banger” or a “rapper… or a criminal.” (just kidding)
   Life is different today.  Life is far more complex than we have ever known it.  The events of the past several months, not only in our adventures in court, but also in the world situation, have changed us forever.  Family court has given us a jaded look at things.  We once believed that we lived in the land of the free.  We were sure there would be justice when we sat in court and there on the wall behind HIM or HER judge, was Lady Justice ….blindfolded and promising fairness, justice and mercy.

Unfortunately, we have learned in family law court --- there is no semblance of justice or fairness.  We have also learned that nothing will ever be the same as it was in the good old days when we had a family, when we were successful and confident.  We had passion!  Remember when we were so passionate about so many things?  We had new ideas … a better mouse trap, a new toilet seat for kids.  We were constantly imagining new creations in our thoughts, mentally developing new business inventions that would revolutionize the world.



Did we let THEM kill our Passion?  Remember when your mate would rave about how BRILLIANT you were?  Maybe she wasn’t placating or conning you?  Maybe she actually observed brilliance in you.  It’s possible you had some incredible ideas that you never fulfilled.  You’ve undoubtedly had passion for many things in your life … but you may now have concluded that you can’t be that passionate about anything ever again.

After all the pain, the disappointment, the heartbreak ---   after all the unexpected disasters that have happened, how could you ever turn your life around from the negative to the positive?  It will be one of the more difficult things you have ever achieved, but ---- you must get over it! You must get over it!