In Memory of Allen Wells
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Allen Wells Recaps his Story
No date given but circa mid Oct 90
Allen Wells Recaps his Story
Forgive me if I'm in a sour mood - but I just heard the latest in my ongoing
(2+ years and counting) divorce.
I was looking forward to picking my son up this weekend - for the first time
I have seen him in 7 months. I had it all arranged and cleared with my ex (in
writing, of course).
It seems that this morning she managed to have a warrant issued for my
arrest. If I step foot in the state of NH, I will be put in jail. I have no
doubt that she will have the marshall waiting for me if I show up to see my son
The way she did it was rather amusing. They took a matter for which a judge
had specifically decided NOT to put me into contempt (mainly because it was a
reaction to her violation of court orders which she HAD been in contempt for).
They managed to get an expedited hearing in front of a different judge at a time
my lawyer could not make it. The court turned down a written plea from my lawyer
for a rescheduling, and ordered me jailed in a hearing that my lawyer wasn't
even at. (If you're interested, see history below.)
My lawyer assures me that this is so irregular and absurd that he should have
no problem overturning it - but not before Friday. So, all my hopes for seeing
my son (not to mention the non-refundable plane ticket) are down the drain. I
knew it was too good to be true.
I'm hoping my lawyer can undo the arrest order before they can convert it
into an arrest warrent here in WA. God, it was a good thing I decided to move
away ... otherwise I'd be in jail now ...
After 1.5 years of incredibly strained visitation punctuated by bouts of
violence (car windshield bashed in, physical assault, etc), I decided I had to
get some distance between me and my ex. After a nation-wide job search, I take
the best offer I get. Unfortunately, it is a 25% cut in pay. Since I was already
paying over half of my take-home in 'temporary' support, I applied for a 'change
The court refuses to give an expedited hearing. At the hearing in April, the
court claims I am voluntarily underemployed (thus my previous salary should be
used in support calculations - they discount my claims of abuse because, after
all, they don't believe my ex ever abused me ...), but realizes I can't continue
to pay that level of support (mortgage and costs of the marital home plus
$600/month). The court orders that the marital home immediately be sold, and
that my ex co-operate fully in the sale of the home.
My ex refuses to even let a broker into the house to do an appraisal. My
lawyer files for a contempt citation. Her laywer files for a reconsideration. I
stop paying the mortgage as of June (I didn't have the money). Her lawyer files
for a contempt citation based on my non-payment. They ask to have me jailed.
The court refuses to give an expedited hearing. In July, the same judge hears
the motions. My ex is charged with contempt for violating the court order and
ordered again to cooperate with the sale of the home. Her motion to reconsider
is denied. Her motion to put me in contempt is denied.
She continues to refuse to allow a broker into the house. I continue to not
pay the mortgage. She files for ANOTHER reconsideration (with no new evidence or
claims). We file another motion for contempt. She files another motion for
contempt based on non-payment. They ask to have me jailed again.
The court refuses to give an expedited hearing. The same judge hears the
motions again. This time, she (the judge) decides that December (the final
divorce date) is close enough that she vacates (nullifies) the order to sell the
house, saying it will be decided at the final divorce date. The contempt of
court is lifted. Motions to put both of us in contempt were denied.
Her lawyer files for contempt against me again, yet again asking that I be
jailed. He gets an expedited hearing (the normal delay for a hearing would put
it beyond our December trial) on a date my lawyer cannot make. My lawyer asks
for a rescheduling (generally a routine matter). The court denies the
rescheduling. Her laywer (without my lawyer present) gets the court to issue a
warrant for my arrest.
The only other matters muddying the waters were my motions complaining about
my inability to talk to my son on the phone, and asking for court ordered phone
visitation times (granted - I get to talk to him every Sunday at 8PM), my motion
complaining that my ex was only honoring my phone visitation about 1/2-2/3 of
the time (not granted), and my request (based on the recommendations of the
Guardian) that my son have a psych evaluation (granted, though my ex is not
co-operating with the order). All of these were opposed by my ex.
In April, my ex was ordered to sell the house. In June, I stop paying the
mortgage because she wasn't selling the house and I was out of money. Despite
repeated court motions and being put into contempt, no action is taken against
my ex. Without even being put into contempt first, I have a warrent for my
arrest issued at a hearing where I have no representation and my side is not
The funny thing is that the house is going into forclosure anyway. There is
no way that my ex can afford to keep the place, even if she gets child support
based on my old income (she is counting on alimony on top of it - I hope she is
deluded ...). If she HAD co-operated in the immediate sale of the house, we
probably could have paid off the mortgage and maybe had a few $$ left over (not
many). However, the real estate market has been plunging there, and even if I
won the lottery and paid off the back mortgage, it couldn't be sold for the
outstanding debt any more. Of course, she doesn't care. Her name isn't on the
mortgage so it isn't her credit rating that is being trashed ... she figures all
of this is worth while if it keeps her in the house for a few extra months rent
If there's anyone out there who still doesn't think the system is biased
against men, keep it to yourself for a while. I'm really not in the mood for it
... How many women do YOU know who were beaten by their husbands, yet still have
to financially support them after they finally get away? Who have custody of
their child given to the person who abused them? Who stay up nights worrying
about what is happening to their child now?
---------- "Custer was here for one afternoon. The Indians were here
Alien | for years." - Barbara Booher, overseer of Last Stand Hill
---------- and the Custer Battlefield National Monument
Allen Wells on paternity tests
Posted 2006 09 04